Similarly to my blog post, “Assume People Are Good,” choosing joy and making happiness a habit has been a concept that I’ve toyed around with in my head for a long time. I’ve had “choose happy” written in the notes on my phone for awhile. It’s been one of those blog ideas that I didn’t feel like I had worked through enough to be of value to you. Well that is, until I got an email from Queen Rach the other day. Her email was about making a joy list. Along the same lines as my intentions for this blog, but a much snappier name than just ‘happiness is a choice.’
I am one of the happiest people I know.
This is not by accident and it wasn’t always this way. I believe this is because I create joy for myself as much as I can. Here’s the thing, to be your happiest self, you must surround yourself with good people and you have to love yourself. But that’s not the idea behind this particular blog post.
I think that we can “manufacture” happiness by choosing joy. And by choosing joy, I mean planning for it. We are all so dang busy all the time, we don’t ever take time to really think about the things in life that bring us true joy. If you feel like you’re not regularly experiencing moments of giddy bliss in your life, assess those first areas of concern I mentioned above. After that, set aside time to write a joy list. It may just be that you haven’t declared the things in life that you really enjoy and therefore you don’t plan them in to your daily life. Consider this a way of intentionally filling your own cup. I know it’s easy to put yourself on the back burner but declaring what makes you joyful and pursuing more of those things is transformative.
I put together a joy list just for this blog to give you some ideas of mine. Some of these are within my control and some are not. But by calling out the moments that light me up, I am better able to incorporate more of them into my life. We can ALL use more moments of joy. Plus, when you plan for them, it gives you something exciting to look forward to and there’s so much joy in that too.
Choosing Joy: My Joy List
1. Hearing Matt laugh really hard.
Especially if I am the one who made him laugh.
2. A really delicious bagel with butter and cream cheese.
I eat a bagel almost every day but I usually eat half at a time with no butter to better fit my macro goals. But every now and then, I’ll eat the whole thing with butter and cream cheese and it is just so indulgent.
3. Hearing I made a difference with a blog or social media post
Getting feedback from a friend (or IG friend) that something I wrote or said made a difference for them. Whether it’s fitness related or just life advice, it makes my heart burst.
4. Counting down to a trip with my best friends
The anticipation of a girls trip is half the fun. Plus the group chat is lit. My friends make me laugh constantly.
5. Getting together with family to watch my nephew’s baseball games.
There’s something really special about everyone stopping their life every Saturday to come together and cheer for him. Usually we go to lunch after too. It’s one of those thing I never want to miss and one of the best parts about moving back home.
6. Planning ahead for a night in alone to treat myself
I plan for a special treat meal (usually crab legs), some wine, and a favorite show or book. It is bliss y’all.
7. Watching my fiancé and my brother in law joke around.
Or my fiancé and any of my family members for that matter. It’s everything I ever hoped for in the person I would marry.
8. Celebrating wins with people
When people come to me to celebrate their wins. Usually it’s fitness related and it makes me just beam with happiness that they want to tell me about their success.
9. Sitting in a crowded bar with Matt and laughing/talking.
It really is as corny as the movies, but it’s like no one else is there but him. Especially a date night when we really need to reconnect.
10. The first day of the year where you can keep the windows open all day and it’s not hot.
Where my Florida people at?! Y’all know the day that you can keep the AC off and keep the windows open for the entire day. I look forward to it all year.
11. Cleaning the whole house and then lighting candles.
If I’ve planned well enough, I try and coordinate this one with number 10 on this list for the best day ever.
12. The trifecta
Clean sheets, freshly bathed dogs, and shaved legs all in the same day. It’s like a comet, it doesn’t happen very often.
13. Conversations with my best friend, Kalyn where I didn’t realize how much I needed to talk to her.
You know those conversations where your soul just feels refreshed?
14. Slow Sunday mornings with Matt and the dogs.
No immediate plans. Sleep in and cuddle with the dogs in bed for awhile.
15. A workout when I stumble upon some really good songs/throwbacks.
Nothing gives me a better workout than a really good playlist or a few throwbacks I haven’t heard in awhile. If you see me in the gym on these days, don’t mind me I am just having a dance party by myself.
16. Going out to eat with my parents when I haven’t seen them in awhile or we have a lot to catch up on.
They’re like really cool okay. These types of dinners were a lot more prevalent when I was in college and lived far away. Every time we got together and went to dinner was like a dang holiday.
17. A mid-day nap
Specifically after a big meal and with no other plans for the day.
I hope this encouraged you to make a joy list. While I am someone who plans for fun and joy pretty often, this list was such a great reminder to cherish all of these really good moments in life.
What is something that produces true joy in your life? Let’s chat about it in the comments below!
-The Relatable Red
